As the Beatles Say…

“It was 20 years ago today…”

In the week of July 14, 1990, the following happened:

After meeting with West German Chancellor Helmut Kohl, Soviet President Mikhail S. Gorbachev reluctantly gives his blessing to a united Germany in NATO, stressing that a united Germany must choose its alliance. President George Herbert Walker Bush welcomed Gorbachev’s change of position. Removing the last big obstacle to a single German state, Poland declares itself “entirely satisfied” with firm new border guarantees. Reunification is expected to come December 2 with all-German elections. President Mikhail S. Gorbachev orders the immediate diversification of the Soviet Union’s state-run radio and television system, so that all political movements will have access to the airwaves, ending the Communist Party’s monopoly.

In news closer to my neck of the woods:

Cincinnati native and baseball star Pete Rose is sentenced to five months in prison and fined $50 thousand for cheating on his taxes. Rose failed to report $354 thousand in income from baseball memorabilia sales autograph appearances and from monies made from gambling, for which he was banned from baseball.

Bestselling books include:

Coyote Waits - Tony Hillerman

The Burden of Proof - Scott Turow

Message From NAM - Danielle Steel

The Stand - Stephen King

An Inconvenient Woman - Dominick Dunne

Dave Barry Turns 40 - Dave Barry

Men At Work - George F. Will

Captain Sir Richard Francis Burton - Edward Rice

Barbarians At The Gate - Bryan Burrough/John Helyar

Top albums include:

I’m Breathless - Madonna

Please Hammer Don’t Hurt Em - M.C. Hammer

Poison - Bell Biv DeVoe

Pretty Woman - Soundtrack

Wilson Phillips - Wilson Phillips

Step by Step - News Kids on the Block

Violator - Depeche Mode

Soul Provider - Michael Bolton

Brigade - Heart

Shut Up and Dance - Paula Abdul

I Do Not Want What I Haven’t Got - Sinead O’Connor

And playing at the movies:

Die Hard 2 - Bruce Willis, Bonnie Bedelia, William Atherton, John Amos

Ghost - Patrick Swayze, Demi Moore, Whoopi Goldberg

Days Of Thunder - Tom Cruise, Nicole Kidman

Disney’s - The Jungle Book (reissue)

Ford Fairlane - Andrew Dice Clay

Quick Change - Bill Murray, Geena Davis, Randy Quaid, Jason Robards

Dick Tracy - Warren Beatty, Madonna

Total Recall - Arnold Schwarzenegger

Another 48 Hours - Edie Murphy, Nick Nolte

The Jetsons

Robocop - Peter Weller

Navy Seals - Charlie Sheen, Michael Biehn, Joanne Whalley-Kilmer, Bill Paxton

Pretty Woman - Richard Gere, Julia Roberts

Betsy’s Wedding - Alan Alda, Molly Ringwald

Thanks to Mr. Pop History for that walk down memory lane.

July 14 is also Bastille Day, named for the storming of the Bastille prison that marked the beginning of the French Revolution. So, for all my French readers and fans of all things French, “Vive la France!”

Most important to me, however, is that July 14 marks the day that I made the most important commitment of my life. It’s the day I got all dressed up in a frilly white gown, rode to the church in a horse-drawn carriage, walked down the aisle on the arm of my tuxedo-clad father, and married my best friend. Several things stand out in my mind about that evening: it was warm, but it wasn’t stifling hot like I expected it to be; the priest presiding over the ceremony had a broken arm; I giggled when I saw there were gnats in my bouquet of silk flowers; the overwhelming feeling of gratitude and love I had when I saw so many of my friends and family in the congregation; looking at the sparkling diamonds on my finger after we exchanged rings, dazzled and amazed; kissing my new husband while flashes went off all around us. It was a beautiful ceremony, a loud, fun reception, and a wonderful honeymoon on the East Coast.

It was 20 years ago today. And it was the start of the best years of my life.

My husband is still my best friend. He’s the one I think of first whenever something exciting happens, or when I need someone to console me. He’s a great listener, a fixer, a get-it-done kind of guy, with a wicked sense of humor and killer blue eyes. He’s a wonderful father to our two boys; he’s an amazing writer, musician, thinker, and partner. He has sacrificed so many of his own dreams for our family, and I couldn’t be more grateful to him for that.

I hope someday I can help him to realize the dreams he has yet to achieve. I hope that, when our boys are out of school and off on their own, we can travel, see the places we’ve dreamed about, and maybe retire in a nice little cottage by the sea or a lake. I hope that we both live to be very old and healthy as horses so we can continue to appreciate our lives and each other. I hope that we’ll have grandchildren and great-grandchildren to cherish, but that we’ll always put each other first in our lives.

Happy 20th anniversary, Keith. I cherish you and the life we’ve built together. Let’s build some more, babe.

The End of Grade School

Yes, I know–technically, summer doesn’t arrive until June 21. There’s enough of a Pagan left in me to recognize the importance of the Solstice. But around my house, summer has officially arrived since my boys are finished with school.

It’s been an emotional and exhausting two weeks. My boys have attended the same small Episcopal school since kindergarten, and they graduated on Friday from the 8th grade. The last days of school were filled with lots of activities, honors, and fun for them. For me, it was a time of great nostalgia and reflection. I remember the process of trying to find a good school for them to attend. The boys had been in a Montessori preschool for two years, and we loved it, but we knew we couldn’t afford to send them to the Montessori grade school in our area. It was simply out of our reach financially, and there wasn’t any help available through scholarships or grants. Although we live in a decent neighborhood, the public grade school here was not on par with other schools in the area, and we’d heard terrible things about the teachers from folks who’d worked there and from neighbors who’d sent their kids there. My husband and I had both attended Catholic school, and we’d received excellent educations. My husband, however, was reticent to send our boys to Catholic school because we no longer practiced Catholicism, and he didn’t want our boys to feel left out or confused by Catholic traditions and sacraments in which they wouldn’t be allowed to participate. Honestly, our options were pretty narrow for kindergarten. We could still send them to the Montessori school they attended, but we felt that we should move them sooner rather than later if a school we liked offered kindergarten. We really didn’t know what to do, and time was running out. It was already almost August, and we needed to make a decision.

Of course, I prayed about the subject and asked for Spirit to guide me to the right place for the boys. A student in one of my classes gave me a reading, and I asked about what school I should send the boys to. She described to a T the Montessori school where they already went, and I wondered if Spirit was trying to tell me not to worry, to just send them there for kindergarten and forget about moving them. Maybe the timing wasn’t right. I went out to Camp Chesterfield, the Spiritualist camp where I trained as a medium, and I received a reading from one of the mediums there. I asked about school for the boys, and she said she got the impression they were going to a Christian school where they would receive an excellent academic and moral education. As soon as I heard that, I balked. The Christian schools in my area that I knew about were way too dogmatic for my tastes, meaning that they were conservative, fundamentalist schools that left no room for my leftist, progressive, and open-minded approach to life and spirituality. There was no way I was sending my children to that type of school. I was completely befuddled by Spirit’s messages.

As I drove home that day, I remember saying to my spirit guides aloud in the car, “Look: I know you’re trying to help, and I appreciate it, but I’m more confused than ever. Can you please help me to find the right school for the boys, and can you please make it perfectly clear when I’ve found the right place? Oh, and it needs to be affordable, too. No use showing me a great school if we can’t afford to send them there! And remember, you guys: time is running out! We need to make a decision in the next couple of weeks.” I said my piece to Spirit, and I figured I’d let it go.

A few days later, I was talking to a friend of my mom’s, whose daughter-in-law was helping me by babysitting my boys. I was complaining about the school issue, and she said, “Have you talked to B? She’s sending M (her oldest) to Bethany School because the classes are smaller, and she felt he’d do better there. Maybe you should look into it.” I asked her where the school was, and she said, “It’s in Glendale.” I couldn’t believe that–this was a suburb literally right down the street from my house, and I’d never seen a school there. “Oh, it’s there,” she assured me. “It’s tucked into the middle of a neighborhood. Most people don’t know about it.”

I was intrigued, but I didn’t pursue it. A couple of days passed, and I ran into an old friend. We talked about our children, and she mentioned how well her daughter was doing now in school. I asked where she went, and she said, “Bethany School, in Glendale.” I was shocked, but I knew better than to ignore the mention of the same school twice in one week. My friend said, “Why don’t we arrange a time when you can see the school? I’ll go with you–they do tours.” She happened to live right down the street from the school, so we called and made a time to take a tour. She went with me, and we walked to the Bethany campus. And this was one of the first things I saw:

This is a picture of the beautiful Bethany School chapel. The grounds at Bethany are lush, filled with trees and plants and stately old buildings that give the campus a charm and a peace that is unmatched by any other school. As soon as I stepped onto the grounds, I knew: this was the place for my children. I recognize a message from Spirit when I receive it!

The medium at Chesterfield was right: Bethany is a Christian school, an Episcopal day school, but it isn’t like the other schools in the area, ones that I found to be too confining in their beliefs. The Sisters of the Transfiguration, the order that runs Bethany, welcome children of all backgrounds, making the school diverse in its socio-economic and religious fabric. Although the children are expected to attend chapel every week and Christian education is a big part of the curriculum, respect is also an important component of their educational approach. I always felt comfortable with what my children were taught in regard to religion, but to me, Bethany is much more than just a religious school. It’s a place that valued my children for the individuals they are. They were challenged academically, and they were expected to do their best. They were encouraged to try new things and to develop an appreciation of other cultures and people. Most of all, they were loved by their teachers, who were devoted to their well-being and their growth as students and as human beings. What more could you ask from a school?

I went home that day after my tour and said to my husband, “This is the school. This is where the boys need to be.”

Of course, we looked at the financial commitment and nearly had heart failure. The school was more expensive than the Montessori school we couldn’t afford. But…Bethany offered scholarships, and the head of school urged me to apply. We did, and I said to Spirit, “OK. If this is the right school for the boys, we need to get these scholarships. Otherwise, we won’t be able to afford it.”

I’m sure by now you know: we got the scholarships. Amazing scholarships. And we got them almost every year after that, even in very tough economic times (my husband suffered two job losses in the 9 years we were at Bethany). We were always able to afford to send them to school there, and I know it’s because that’s where they needed to be. Spirit led us to Bethany, and we put our faith in that fact. When we needed help, it was always available to us. The staff, administration, and faculty of Bethany were wonderful about keeping our boys at the school and finding ways to help us when we needed it. I will always be grateful for their commitment to our family. And I’ll always be grateful to Spirit for helping us to find the very best school for our precious sons.

Those precious sons have now graduated. In August, they’ll start a whole new adventure: high school. They’re attending a Roman Catholic school in our area, and one of our sons won an academic scholarship to this high school, too, which helps us to better afford it. What a blessing! And I know, again, that we’re going in the right direction, that Spirit is leading us to the best place for our children. That’s the intention I set, and I have faith that Spirit won’t lead us wrong. I know my boys will be successful there, too.

If you’re in the Cincinnati area and you’re interested in an amazing school experience for your children, I definitely recommend that you check out Bethany School. You’ll never find a better place.

And congratulations to my sons, Max and Ben, who have finished nine wonderful, amazing, challenging years. They have achieved great things, and I know that will continue in high school. I couldn’t be more proud of them both, and I love them with all my heart.

Overcome

Have you ever had one of those moments when you’re overcome with emotion?

I went on my usual walk this morning, a path that’s a little over 2 miles at our local county park. It’s a meandering paved trail that goes up and down hills and around curves, and it circles a large lake. I like to go early in the morning when it’s quiet and fairly deserted. I usually pass a handful of joggers or dog-walkers on the trail, and I enjoy the solitude. Today’s weather was a bit more brisk than usual; frost dusted the greenery choking the sides of the path, and I could see my breath as I huffed and puffed up and down the hills. My hands and ears were cold, and I was walking faster than normal because of the low temperatures. But then, as I rounded a short bluff, I saw a sight that looked a lot like this:

The beauty of the lake, and the sight of the mist rising in the sunshine, stopped me in my tracks. My eyes filled up with tears. I can’t explain the feeling I had, but it was so overwhelming I had to stop walking for a minute to catch my breath. A profound sense of awe and gratitude filled me, a wave of emotion that I’ve felt before in fleeting moments. So I stayed in that moment, breathing, watching, allowing the feeling to wash over and through me, so grateful to just be alive to experience that incredible sense of joy. The song playing on my iPod was Bruce Springsteen’s The Rising, and it seemed the perfect soundtrack for this moment suspended in time.

I left the park with a light heart. I hope to carry it with me through everything I do today.

These are the moments we live for, even though they may be few, short, and far between. They are the moments of sheer ecstasy in the simplest thing: freezing air searing our lungs, the scent of water, mist hanging like lace in the air, birds streaking across the blue sky. These are glimpses of such powerful beauty that we stand still, unable to move, able only to soak them in, admire them, appreciate them. They remind us of what we are: travelers together on this planet, all of us searching for happiness and peace. God is in these moments, I believe, and we can reach out and connect with that Divine Presence at an intimate, awesome level.

I hope you will have one of these moments today, too, and experience the blessing that comes with it.

Spring Break 2010

Well, it’s arrived! A week of days off for my twin boys, who are now nearly at the end of their 8th grade year at their Episcopal day school. They’ve been at this school since kindergarten, and I can’t believe they’ll be graduating in June and then moving on to high school. I’m sure I’ll have more commentary on all of that as it draws nearer, but for now, I know they’re happy to have a week off school to…paint their bedrooms.

Yes, that’s right–I’m a sadistic mom, making them do chores around the house during their time off. But believe me, their bedrooms really need the attention. My older son still had the Peanuts characters up around his room that we chose for their nursery before they were born. Both of the boys have picked out new colors for their walls, and we have invested in paint trays, drop cloths, and other tools to help us with the task. I’m looking forward to the finished product.

So, there may not be any updates here on the blog this week as we tackle this big task at Casa Vanden Eynden. When we’re finished, I may or may not have the strength (or the patience) to report on the job. This also means that correspondence sent to me this week, either via email or the blog, may languish for a bit, so please be patient. I’ll most likely be in the bathroom, trying to scrub paint out of my hair.

Wish us luck!

The Radio Ambush

A week or so ago, I was a guest on an internet radio show. I do a lot of these since I’ve published my books, and, for the most part, I really enjoy them. I get to talk with some very interesting, smart, fun people about topics I love: mediumship, ghosts, Tarot, magick, Spiritualism, writing, the creative process, and many others. Whenever I get a request to do one of these shows, I try my best to fit it into my schedule. It’s another way to connect with more people and to spread the message that my books promote. I consider it an honor to be asked to appear, and I am grateful for the opportunity.

Most of these radio shows are done on stations that cater to a metaphysical audience. This latest one was no exception. When the host contacted me, I checked out the webpage and thought the show’s audience would be right up my alley. They’d featured interviews with other mediums, psychics, and ghost hunters. Via email, the host and I arranged a night that would work for both of us for my appearance. That correspondence took place over 3 months before my spot. In the meantime, I tried to send him copies of my books (which didn’t work out), but we didn’t really have any other contact.

The day of my appearance (which was scheduled for that evening), I received a surprising email from the host. He explained that he had a co-host on the show who was a conservative Christian and might have some questions for me about my mediumship work. I got the distinct impression from this that there might be a confrontation about religion on the docket.

Honestly, I didn’t know how to respond. The terrified, non-confrontational part of me wanted to immediately back out. I don’t enjoy fighting about anything, let alone feeling as if I have to defend my spiritual beliefs. I even wrote an entire chapter in my latest book, Ask A Medium, about a similar topic. I wrote that chapter for all of the clients and students who tell me how much they hate trying to defend themselves against radical religious types who berate them and try to scare them out of their spiritual views. I don’t like this any more than the next guy, but over the years, I’ve learned some strategies to at least feel more sure and steady when embroiled in this kind of debate. But having to do this on the radio was not my idea of a fun time.

The responsible part of me chided myself for wanting to cancel my appearance. Having hosted my own radio show, I didn’t want to leave anyone in the lurch if I backed out at the last minute. My reasonable side posited that I had not been treated fairly and told up front that this show might turn into a religious debate, and if I didn’t want to do that, I shouldn’t harbor any qualms about saying, “Forget it.” The self-righteous part of me swelled up, too, saying that I shouldn’t be driven away from an opportunity to talk about my beliefs because I was scared I would offend someone with more strident and stringent views. I should be allowed to speak my piece; after all, wasn’t that why I was invited to participate in the first place?

In the end, I dashed off an email to the host, saying that I was not very happy about the prospect of debating religion on the air, but I would do my best.

Well, I did my best–and then some, perhaps.

Look, here’s the thing: if you’re a Christian, and even if you’re not, don’t fling Bible quotes at me. Truth be told, I like the Bible, and there are some wonderful, inspirational words of great wisdom in there. There is also some stuff that is a product of its time and the many, many interpretations and translations the writings have gone through over the centuries. Using the Bible to back up your case is like building a Three Pigs house out of sticks: it won’t withstand the wind from the Wolf. The Bible can be used to support ANY argument that you want to make. Think it’s OK to kill someone? There’s certainly a lot of havoc-wreaking vengeance in the Old Testament, often initiated by Yahweh Himself. Want to sell your daughter into slavery? Go ahead–the Bible says you can! Considering consulting a medium to talk to the dead? The Old Testament says you shouldn’t, and that God will hate you if you do–but isn’t it funny that God didn’t seem to hate Jesus when he had his pow wow with Moses and Elijah on the mountain as his disciples watched? Do you see what I’m driving at here? Evangelical Christians use the Bible as the literal Word of God, but many, like the co-host of this radio show, use it to support their way of thinking while ignoring some of the other parts that don’t suit their parameters.

So, in this radio discussion, I was lambasted with Bible quotes and had my integrity as a medium called into question. How did I know I was talking to good spirits when there are lots of righteous Christians tricked by the devil? Didn’t I know it was wrong to speak to spirits? Didn’t I worry about the health of my soul?

Well, quite frankly: give me a flipping break.

I believe in intention. And I believe in a loving, nurturing God. If you set your intention to always remain in that Divine Energy that is God, then you are not going to touch in with anything in your mediumship work that is evil or negative. Why? Because God’s energy is in EVERY energy. If you set your intention to connect with the Divine Spark of God that resides within every energy, then you will be able to connect with loving, high vibration energies of loved ones who have passed as well as guides, teachers, and angels. Yes, I am aware of the warnings in the Bible that the devil can disguise himself as an angel. But why would a loving God allow this to happen? If you set your intention to connect first with God, then God is not going to allow anything negative to happen to you. Period. Nothing can harm you. You will find your peace, and you will do your work–any work–in that loving light of Creator. End of story.

So what happened in the interview? I tried to be patient, and I tried to answer the questions in a mild tone of voice and explain my position as lovingly as I could. I even threw a few Bible quotes of my own in there to prove my point about being able to use the Bible to support any position. (Another reason not to quote the Bible to me: I can quote it right back to you, mister.) But ultimately, I said, “Look. You are not going to convince me that I’m wrong, and I’m not going to convince you that you’re wrong. You have your faith, and I have mine. All we’re doing in arguing is perpetuating a negative energy cycle because we’ll wind up mad at each other. Why do that?” Eventually, the co-host relented, and the first host went on with questions about mediumship development–questions I would much rather answer.

I am not advocating disagreements here, nor am I advocating picking a fight and trying to belittle someone else. But I am advocating standing up for your beliefs. Educate yourself. One of the best ways to do this is to read arguments against your beliefs and then to come up with intelligent answers as to why those arguments don’t hold any water. If you’re going to argue theology, know your subject. Be as smart as you can about what you do so that you can present your side in a thoughtful, organized, intelligent way. Knowledge is power.

Try not to let yourself become embroiled in a heated argument, though. I did my best in this instance to control my temper. It takes a lot to make me mad, but I was mad by the end of that segment. (And hey: Jesus got mad in the Bible, too. Remember the scene he made at the temple?) But I tried to remember that keeping a cool head was only going to make me look more reasonable, and raising my voice in anger would make me look defensive. In the end, I was proud of myself for defending my beliefs and not backing down when confronted while remaining reasonable and gracious.

I was, however, quite miffed about the whole situation. I don’t think it was very professional of these radio hosts to treat me this way. I think there’s a lesson here for me about better preparation for these shows. I’ll have to be more careful, more selective, in the future. So I do thank Spirit for this, because I know it will make me a better person in the long run.

I hope some of you will find encouragement by reading this post. Be respectful, but don’t make nice; don’t back down. Your beliefs, and your integrity, are worth more than that.

The Dixie Chicks say it pretty darn well.

May blessings abound for you.

Honors and Other Scary Things

Yesterday, I went to a reception for local authors given by the Ohioana Library and the Cincinnati Public Library. I’d received an invitation in the mail and really didn’t know what to expect. I was pleasantly surprised to find such a large gathering of folks at the main branch of the public library, people who really seemed excited to welcome and honor local writers for their publishing successes. The reception consisted of introductions, a panel of sports writers talking about their work (it seems there are a bunch of Cincinnati writers penning books about the Reds!), and then a presentation of certificates to the authors themselves. During the presentation of the certificates, the hosts read a brief biography about each author, which they asked us to submit beforehand. When I’d accepted the invitation to the event, I’d dashed off my “normal” biography without a second thought and sent it in. It contains the usual information about my work as a medium ,writer, and instructor–no big changes, nothing unusual.

At least, not unusual to me. But as I sat in the audience yesterday, watching the other authors receive their certificates and listening to their biographies, I started to feel very nervous. Most of these people were professional writers with credentials as long as my arm. They taught at the university level or wrote for magazines and newspapers. Some had written countless books about heavy subjects like cancer, cardiology, the architecture of Cincinnati, or the history of the Catholic Church. Many of them had a “Doctor” in front of their names, and lots had awards out the yin-yang. And as I started sweating my background, I started to wonder how my biography would sound to all of these learned, intellectual people. What would they think of a clairvoyant medium? Would they chuckle and shake their heads over my references to Tarot reading or angels? I could just hear the snickers and the whispers as I sat there, my folded hands clutched together in an ever-tightening death grip.

Worse, what would my children think? They sat next to me, politely paying attention, well-trained from their 9 years in Episcopal school, where they sit through chapel services every week. Would they hear their mom’s biography and sink lower in their seats? Would they be embarrassed if someone in the audience laughed as I walked up to accept my certificate?

Boy, your mind can do terrible things to you, can’t it?

When my name was read out (and mispronounced, as usual), I stood and started up the aisle. It felt like I was walking in a dream, underwater, with no clothes on. I was glad I didn’t have to say anything except “thank you” to the woman handing out the certificates because I was afraid my voice wouldn’t work. When I turned to face the gathering, I spotted my husband on the side aisle, the family camera in hand. I tried to smile, but I’m sure it looked more like a grimace. I haven’t yet looked at the pictures he took; I think I’m afraid I’ll be as white as a sheet. Everything seemed amplified: the lights, brighter; the sound, magnified; my feelings of dread, intense enough to turn my stomach.

But you know what? No one laughed. At least, I didn’t see it if they did. I didn’t notice any disbelieving, shaking heads, either. And I wasn’t pelted with tomatoes. I made it back to my seat in one piece, and I sat there, staring at my certificate with the tremor in my hands melting away.

Now, why would I feel this way? Why would I assume the worst at a moment when I should be proud and happy?

It’s hard to say. Sometimes I am still afraid to speak up for my beliefs. There remains a small part of me that wants more than anything to be accepted, liked, and respected by everyone. EVERYONE. This is, I know, completely unrealistic, and yet I can’t deny that the feeling is there. I don’t like confrontation; I don’t like to have to fight for anything, because I’ve never been a good fighter. I prefer peace; I prefer compromise; I definitely prefer everyone getting along. But the world isn’t always like that, is it? Sometimes, you have to stick up for yourself. Sometimes, you have to voice an unpopular opinion because it’s the right thing to do. Sometimes, you have to realize that not everyone is going to agree with you, or, worse yet, that some people may downright not like you for what you believe, say, or do. And you have to be able to live with that.

Over the years, I know I’ve come a long way in this department. It has never been easy or comfortable for me to voice a dissenting opinion. It has been extremely difficult for me to show emotions like anger or grief because, as a child, I wasn’t allowed to have these feelings. I was expected to always be happy, sunny, and/or quiet. Only one person in my household was allowed to have feelings, and it wasn’t me. I have always been a peacemaker, a referee, the one who smoothes things over and makes it nice. I still do this; I accept that this is part of my nature, and it’s not necessarily a bad thing to embrace. And yet, I’ve learned some things about myself and the world around me. I’ve learned that I have the right to believe the things I do and to live the way I want to live, as long as I’m not hurting myself or anyone else in the process. I’ve learned it’s OK to demand respect and to have the expectation that I deserve it. I’ve learned that I’ve worked long and hard to get where I am, and in recognizing my own divinity, that I should love myself and the journey that has brought me to this place. I have learned that I can and should defend myself if I’m backed into a corner (there may be another post coming soon about this), and I should be proud of who I am, no matter what others think of me.

So, even though I’ve learned all of this, I still get nervous sometimes. Just like yesterday. And yet I was relieved and happy when things turned out well. I did belong at that reception. I worked arduously on my books, and it’s nice to receive some recognition for the work. And maybe, just maybe, someone will pick up one of the books who wouldn’t have before, because they remember seeing me there and thinking, “Well, isn’t that an interesting subject to explore?”

After the presentation, they served refreshments. As I stood in line for punch with my boys (who, after all, didn’t seem the least bit embarrassed to be seen with me), a lady approached and asked, “Are you the medium?”

“Yes,” I said with a smile.

“Can I have your card?”

I handed her one with steady hands. Will she call me? I don’t know. It doesn’t matter. All that matters is that I was there, and it was a good experience.

Blessings to you all this fine day.

xo

Best of Cincinnati Awards

I am thrilled and humbled to discover that I have been nominated for several City Beat “Best of Cincinnati” awards! I have been nominated in the following categories:

Religious Leader
Massage Therapist
Local Actress
Local Author

It really is super to be acknowledged in such a way. If you’d like to cast your votes, you can visit the site here . There are lots of great categories to vote in, too, so don’t be shy. Cincinnati is a terrific city, so let’s support all the wonderful people, places, and events we have!

Happy Tuesday, everyone. Blessings to you all!

Dear Blog…

Dear Blog (and beloved blog readers),

I’m so sorry I’ve been neglecting you lately. There’s been a lot going on in my life. Some good things, some great things, some worrisome things–in a nutshell, life has been happening, and it’s been blowing past me at the speed of light.

Here are some good and great things that have happened:

1. I was cast in a play! I am playing the wonderful role of elderly German agent Lillian in Fairfield Footlighers’ production of I Hate Hamlet. I am very excited to be working on a creative project, and so far, I am loving every moment of it. I’ve been feeling a creative void recently, and acting always helps to fill that up for me. As a director, I’m also enjoying watching this production come together, and I admire the way Heidi, our director, handles everything with her no-nonsense, fun approach. I can’t wait to go to rehearsal, which I take as a very good sign. Maybe some of you will be able to come out and see the show, which opens on February 19. Ah, theatre–how I adore you!

2. Our son was awarded a $20,000 scholarship to Roger Bacon High School for the next four years. This is a huge accomplishment, and we are bursting with pride over the news. We are confident that both of our sons will do well at this institution, and we look forward to working with them towards more great achievements when they begin high school in the fall. Having the decision of where they’ll attend high school out of the way also relieves a tremendous burden from our list of worries. We’ve still got to get through the rest of this school year, though!

3. My new book, Ask a Medium: Answers To Your Frequently Asked Questions About the Spirit World, is now available for sale! I am very excited to have this book available to readers. I’ve tried to compile the questions that I’m most frequently asked by clients and other seekers concerning the spirit world, what happens when we die, why ghosts and spirits do certain things, and other sundry metaphysical topics, and I try to provide answers based on research and my own experiences as a medium. I hope readers will truly benefit from this book. And, in other good news: if you’re in the Cincinnati area, my office partner, Joanne, and I are hosting a ASK A MEDIUM discussion and booksigning on Friday, January 22. Starting at 7 p.m., I will talk about the book and answer audience questions. At 8 p.m., the book sales and signings will begin, and we will serve refreshments and socialize as well. Please come if you can, and bring your family and friends for a fun and enlightening evening. For the address for the event, visit my website.

3. The snow is finally melting. Enough said about that.

4. My husband and sons are healthy. Really, that’s important enough to write about, I think, because I’ve been down the unhealthy road before, and yes, I am grateful.

I’ve decided after looking at this list that the positives far outweigh the negatives. Life is good. I’m not even going to discuss the not-so-good things, thereby giving them no energy to thrive. In light of this, you’d think I’d have more time for the blogosphere, right?

Well, I’m going to try to make more time. It’s nice to sometimes gather all of my thoughts together and put out a post. It’s hard, though, to always come up with topics to write about. I don’t want to keep re-hashing the same old stuff.

So, if you have suggestions of what you’d like to see on the blog or information you’d like to read about, please feel free to leave a comment and let me know what it is.

Dearly beloved blog…friends….I’ll hopefully see you again soon.

xox

Reading List 2009

I am an avid reader. Every year, I keep track of all of the books I’ve read throughout that time period. I break them down into fiction and nonfiction, and I was surprised this past year to see how little nonfiction I read. I usually spend a lot of time reading other books about mediumship and various esoteric topics. Apparently, this past year, I needed an escape into a fictional universe more than I needed to learn something new!

Anyway, here is my reading list for 2009.

Fiction

Isabella Moon, Laura Benedict, January. ***

The Lace Reader, Brunonia Barry, January, ****

House, Frank Peretti and Ted Dekker, January, *

The Graveyard Book, Neil Gaiman, January, ****

Need, Carrie Jones, January-February, ***

Coraline, Neil Gaiman, February, ***1/2

The Likeness, Tana French, February, ***1/2

Atonement, Ian McEwan, February-March, ***1/2

Fragile Things: Short Fictions and Wonders, Neil Gaiman, March, ***1/2

Stardust, Neil Gaiman, March, ***

M is for Magic, Neil Gaiman, March, ***

Vanishing Acts, Jodi Picoult, March, ***

Change of Heart, Jodi Picoult, March-April, ***1/2

The Sandman: Preludes and Nocturnes, Neil Gaiman, April, ***

The Sweet In-Between, Sheri Reynolds, April, ***

Between Here and April, Deborah Copaken Kogan, April, **1/2

Serendipity, Louise Shaffer, April, **

Wake, Lisa McMann, April, **1/2

Fade, Lisa McMann, April, ***

Precious, Sandra Novack, May, ***

Romancing the Dead, Tate Hallaway, June, ***

The Sandman: The Doll’s House, Neil Gaiman, June, ***

Lady Macbeth, Susan Fraser King, June, *** (audio book)

The Sandman: Dream Country, Neil Gaiman, June, ** ½

The Sparrow, Mary Doria Russell, July, *** ½

Good Omens, Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett, August, ***

Loving Frank, Nancy Horan, August, ****

Dead Until Dark, Charlaine Harris, September, ***

Life of Pi, Yann Martel, September, *** ½

White is for Witching, Helen Oyeyemi, September ***

Black Ships, Jo Graham, October, ***1/2

The Sandman: Season of Mists, Neil Gaiman, October, ****

The Hour I First Believed, Wally Lamb, November, ***1/2

Handle with Care, Jodi Picoult, November-December, ***

Dexter by Design, Jeff Lindsay, December, ***

Prayers for Sale, Sandra Dallas, December, ***

Juliet, Naked, Nick Hornby, December, ***

Nonfiction

The Secret Life of Houdini: The Making of America’s First Superhero, William Kalush and Larry Sloman, May-June, ***

Handwriting Analysis: Putting it to Work for You, Andrea McNichol, October, ***

Glynis Has Your Number, Glynis McCants, October, ***

As you can see, I read a lot of Neil Gaiman this year and enjoyed it immensely. If you’re looking for something with magical overtones, try his The Graveyard Book, which won the Newberry Medal. It’s for young people, but I found it to be engaging, scary in parts, and utterly delightful.

Another book that had some interesting esoteric connections: The Lace Reader, by Brunonia Barry. The story is set in Salem, Massachusetts, and revolves around a young woman whose aunt reads fortunes for people in pieces of lace. It was a thoroughly engrossing story, with a twist ending and a lovely lyrical style. I also found out that Wiccan High Priestess Laurie Cabot was teaching lace reading courses in October in Salem, and Ms. Barry was going to be signing books at the event. I’d even planned to go, but when my husband lost his job in the late spring, it seemed it wasn’t meant to be. No matter–you’ll still love the book.

If you like faeries or supernatural fiction, you might try Need, by Carrie Jones. Another work for young adults, I was delighted by the story, the realistic characters, and the exciting pace of the book. In the same vein, I enjoyed Lisa McMann’s Wake and Fade, although her writing style took a little getting used to, especially in the first book. I look forward, though, to more work by these two talented ladies.

For a story revolving around faith and what it might mean in our lives, I recommend The Sparrow, by Mary Doria Russell. A challenging tale about scientists and priests finding life on another planet, it took me a while to get into it, but the effort was rewarded by rich characterizations and a compelling, emotional conclusion. I’m so happy my friend Kristy recommended this book to me!

For anyone out there who likes “chick lit” or fun Wiccan characters, you must try Tate Halloway’s series of magickal romance novels. The one I read this past year, Romancing the Dead, is the third in her series of adventures with Garnet Lacey, a wonderfully delightful Witch dating a vampire and working in a New Age store. These books are so lighthearted and humorous, they’re an easy way to pass a weekend in a cloud of fantasy and fun. I dare you not to love them.

Finally, in the nonfiction sector, I did enjoy The Secret Life of Houdini, recommended to me by my (skeptical) friend, Ron. He is a big Houdini fan and always seems to find it enthralling that, as a Spiritualist, I don’t hate the famous magician. Houdini was well-known for his passion for exposing fraudulent mediums during the height of the Spiritualist movement. I certainly don’t hate him–I think Houdini wanted to believe as badly as Mulder on The X-Files. He could just never find the absolute proof of the afterlife and the ability to communicate with Spirit that his logical mind (and chosen profession) demanded. I enjoyed reading about his life and his work–he was obviously a very talented, charming, charismatic man. I did not appreciate the allusions in the book that Spiritualists killed Houdini, but that rumor had been around for a long time, and I can’t really do anything to dispel it. Nevertheless, The Secret Life of Houdini was quite fascinating.

So, what books did you read last year that really stuck with you? I’m interested in any and all titles, no matter if they’re fiction, nonfiction, esoteric…I just love to read!

Musings About 2010

Well, it seems the start of the new year just passed me by. I spent all day on New Year’s Eve in bed with a stomach bug and barely made it to our New Year’s Eve plans with two other families. I had already done quite a bit of thinking about my upcoming year and the goals I wanted to set, but I didn’t get a chance to share any of that process or experience with anyone else. (Maybe that’s not such a bad thing. Does everyone really want to know exactly what I was considering? Isn’t that the argument for the mediocrity of personal blogs in general? But I digress.) Now that I have a moment of free time, I thought I’d sort through some of those thoughts here.

One of my favorite blogues (her spelling, not mine) is written by Lunaea . In this post, she describes a New Year’s Eve tradition where she collects a bunch of “theme” words and puts them all in a bag, choosing one (or more) as her themes for the upcoming year. She also links to a list of wonderful words to start with. I was so delighted by this idea that I printed out the list and decided to do this myself, along with setting my goals for 2010. I always try to set positive goals in the following areas of my life: Health, Career/Finances, Creativity, Family, Community, and Spiritual Practice. This year, I tried to keep my goals simple and straightforward, ones that I could meet with joy every day. Here they are:

Health: More regular exercise. More walks in nature during good weather. Drink more water. Eat more fruits and vegetables. Eat less sugar. Receive more massages.

Career/Finances: Develop online curriculum for mediumship development. Create downloadable e-book for website (subject unknown). Develop marketing strategies. Set goals for client numbers and income per week. Generate new ideas for book projects. Create new audiobooks and meditation CDs. Set up business as LLC.

Creativity: Perform in at least one theatre production. Begin scrapbooking. Do more writing for fun instead of just for obligation.

Family: With boys: Do more listening. Ask more questions. Initiate conversation. Make time together a priority. With husband: Regular date nights. Be more affectionate. Be more appreciative. Be a better listener.  With Dad: Be more compassionate. Be more honest.

Community: Lead more classes at church. Develop more interactive activities for blog.

Spiritual Practice: Spend more time in meditation and prayer. Create and perform more ritual. Go outdoors more for connection experiences. Invest more time and energy in Goddess/moon energy work. Work more with crystal energies for communication and healing.

I feel good about these goals and hope to keep them at the forefront of my mind–that’s really the challenge of facing every day, isn’t it? It can be very easy to get sidetracked.

In performing the word exercise as suggested by Lunaea, I decided to concentrate on pulling three words as themes for my 2010. I asked Spirit to bring words to me that I could work with, use creatively, and experience deeply — words that would teach me important lessons about myself, those around me, and the world on emotional, physical, and spiritual levels. Here are the words I chose:

Catharsis

Abundance

Light

As my first experience with these words, I looked the first two up in the dictionary, wrote down those definitions, and then brainstormed other ideas that came to my mind. Here is what I came up with:

Catharsis: purging; purifying of emotions or relieving of emotional tensions, especially through art; the effect of tragic drama on an audience (Aristotle); alleviation of fear, problems, and complexes by bringing them to consciousness and giving them expression–how can I allow my emotions to flow more freely? Am I afraid to express my emotions? Can I allow big emotions (fear, anger) to have expression? Can I trust myself and those around me to handle these emotions?

Abundance: a great supply; plenty; wealth; prosperity–how can I achieve abundance? Being grateful for abundance in my life key. Make an abundance vision board as creative project. How can I share abundance with others? Where is my abundance (talents, time, etc.)? What do I already have an abundance of? What would I like more of in my life?

Light: Reminded of Marianne Williamson quote, “It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.” This resonates deeply for me at this time! Other ideas: being in the light, the sun, etc. Feeling light-hearted. The concept of weightlessness (lightness). How do these things apply to me? How can I be a brighter light? How can I release my fear (catharsis?) to bring more abundance and light to my life?

I am excited in many ways to face 2010–and I’m a bit frightened. There are changes afoot–I feel them in my bones, and change can be scary. Even as a professional psychic, I still don’t know everything the future holds, and I am especially foggy about my own path ahead. But setting these goals and working with these words, given lovingly by Spirit, allows me to start from a peaceful and safe place. It gives me something to focus on, ideas on which to concentrate my considerable energy, and that seems like a very positive thing.

So how about you? Do you set goals for your New Year? Any you’d like to share? Sometimes it’s nice to voice them so that others can encourage and support you.

No matter what, I pray that 2010 brings bright blessings to you and yours.