MERLYN’S RAVEN Excerpt

It occurred to me that I’ve never shared an excerpt from my novel, MERLYN’S RAVEN, here on my blog.

What the hell is wrong with me?

Ahem.

Anyway–read on for a peek. In this scene, my heroine, Gwendydd, is heartbroken. You’ll find out why.

It was nearly impossible to face Myrddin the next day. When I brought the meal to the druid quarters, he tried to draw me out with jokes and questions, but my short responses and melancholy looks eventually silenced him. Blaise seemed oblivious to it all and, after eating a light meal, retired to the comfort of his private chamber. I walked to the drying table and took up the pestle, throwing a weed I couldn’t recognize into the mortar and grinding it without thought.

I felt Myrddin watching me, his bewilderment palpable in the air, but I did not dare glance his way. I feared collapsing into tears or, worse, confessing my undying love to his great embarrassment. He would know about Lot soon enough, but how could I hide my distress from him without telling him my true feelings? Tears stung my eyes as I pounded the herbs until a hand stayed mine.

“Gwendydd, stop. You’ll shatter the poor mortar, and then what shall we do?”

His tone was light, and it made me angry. I tore my arm away and heaved the pestle across the room. It sprayed dried leaves in an arc across the table as it flew before striking the wall with a sharp ring. “I cannot bear you making fun of me today, Myrddin.”

“I was not making fun. I was trying to distract you from whatever poisons your thoughts.” He reached to touch my shoulder, but I darted away, keeping my face turned askance. I knew if I looked into his eyes, I would lose any control that I had. “Come, what is it?”

I sighed. Sooner or later, he would hear anyway, and had I not told him the truth in all? “My grandfather has found a husband for me. He comes now from Lothian, to be here at Christmastime.”

“I see.” A long pause followed.

Eternal moments later, I could bear it no longer. I whirled towards him, my anger stoked again. “Is that all you can say?”

Myrddin spread his hands in a gesture of acquiescence. “What do you want me to say?”

“You know how unhappy this makes me. How much I hate that I have no say in this, that I must instead be the dutiful granddaughter made into the obedient wife. How can you stand by and watch me suffer?”

“Do you expect me to stop it?” He cocked his head to one side, scowling. “You are the only one who can control your life, Gwendydd. Have you learned nothing in these last months I’ve been instructing you?”

“But that’s a lie!” I shouted. “It’s a lie that I have control. Is that not what magick is, mastery over circumstance? How can I control anything when I am not even the mistress of my own life?”

He took a step toward me, his voice firm. “Of course you have control. It is hard to see now, but there are things you can do. You always have a choice.”

“You’re wrong. I’ve been given no choice here, and it hurts more than you can possibly understand.” I stalked to the door of the chamber and threw it open, trying to check the shaking in my hands so that he would not see my weakness. “I believe our lessons are at an end.”

He frowned. “What do you mean? This does not need to change—“

“Yes, it does. The purpose of these lessons was to make me more attractive to a suitor. Now that Grandfather has promised me to Lord Lot, there is no need for me to study further.” I looked him in the eye, all my tears dried in the wake of my fury. “I thank you, Lord Merlyn, for your guidance. I know that what I have learned will make me a better wife.” I spit out the last word, spun on my heel, and dashed from his sight before he could protest. I headed straight for my chambers and did not emerge until the next morning, promising myself I would cry no more. I was empty inside.

***

And you can buy MERLYN’S RAVEN at Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and Soul Mate Publishing.
Paperback coming in February, 2013!!

 

A WIP and the ULE

For the last two weeks, I’ve been working on my new writing project every spare moment I get. The work-in-progress (WIP–and, dare I say, novel-to-be?) is another fantasy romance inspired by Arthurian legend. What is it with me and this theme? Anyway, it’s always exciting when the words want to flow. Too bad life, and other responsibilities, get in the way.

To that end, I wanted to let everyone know that I’ll be at the Universal Light Expo in Columbus, Ohio this Saturday, October 13 and Sunday, October 14. I will be in booth 713, where I will be giving private readings and selling all of my books. This expo is enormous, and there are tons of great people, products, lectures, and energy for everyone to enjoy. If you’re in the Columbus area, stop by and spend some time with us. On Sunday at 11 am, you can even come and see me demonstrating mediumship with several other wonderful light workers.

These expos, while fun and exciting, always wear me out. But I hope to get back to writing bright and early on Monday!

Blessings to all!

Image above copyright Eve Sakmar Sullivan

First Friday Free Readings–October 5, 2012

It’s time for another round of First Friday Free Readings! I am excited to share these questions and answers with you all today. Let’s get started!

Our first question is from Donna L, who writes:

I have a friend who has re entered my life after a time of separation. I want so badly to trust that they just want friendship and do care for me as they say they do, but I am still unsure.  Can I trust their intentions as being genuine? 

For this reading, I have created a Tarot spread to highlight the following information for Donna. The Tarot cards drawn for her are also listed:

Card 1: What does Donna need to know about this sitution?  3 of Swords

Card 2:  What are the positive aspects or benefits of renewing this friendship?  Major Arcana The High Priestess

Card 3:  What challenges does Donna face in renewing this friendship?  9 of Wands

Card 4:  What is hidden from Donna about this situation that she needs to know?  8 of Cups

Card 5:  What is the general outcome energy of this renewed friendship?  Major Arcana The Chariot

Donna, two Major Arcana cards appear in your reading, indicating a higher message from the Universe concerning this situation. My sense in looking at these cards and where they appear is that your hesitation to renew this friendship and to guard your heart is grounded in a true intuitive understanding of your “friend’s” energy. The 3 of Swords indicates that you were deeply wounded when this relationship ended the first time, and it still hurts you to this day. Even if you and your friend have talked about this, you still carry emotional wounds, and healing is hard for you. The next card, the Major Arcana High Priestess, seems to indicate that there are higher lessons here for you to learn from this experience, and some of it has to do with trusting your own intuition and knowing that deception is part of human nature. The High Priestess often symbolizes hidden things, mysteries, and you may never understand how this other person operates or what motivates her. The lesson for you, however, is to listen to your inner voices, which will not steer you wrong. You are holding back for a reason, and you need to give yourself permission to limit this person’s access to you. There may be a hidden agenda here. The 9 of Wands represents challenges that you face if you decide to continue on a road to mending fences, and as a challenge card, I feel this is talking about your tendency to make things too easy for someone who has hurt you in the past. You can forgive them, but that doesn’t mean that you forget what has happened and let it happen again. The 8 of Cups indicates things that may be hidden from you, and this card often symbolizes someone walking away from a situation or leaving behind emotional turmoil. My feeling here is that you may end up with another broken heart if you allow this person to get too close–she may end up leaving again. The last card, Major Arcana The Chariot, indicates the general outcome energy of this situation. The Chariot is generally a positive card, so it may be that moving on will be beneficial for both of you if you can bring yourself to face the situation and to bless the other person while releasing her. This may not be easy, but you are learning an important lesson essential to your spiritual growth–and so is she.

Donna, I hope this reading helps you in some way. Thank you for submitting your question! Blessings to you.

Our second question today is from Jennifer H, who writes:

What do I need to do to have a successful writing career? 

For this question, I created the following 4-card spread for Jennifer. The cards pulled are listed next to their placement in the spread:

Card 1:  What is the current energy surrounding Jennifer and her writing? 7 of Pentacles

Card 2:  What challenges to writing success face Jennifer? Ace of Cups

Card 3:  How can she best overcome these challenges?  Major Arcana Temperance

Card 4: What is the overall energy concerning Jennifer’s writing career in 2013?  Four of Wands

Jennifer, there is a very promising energy surrounding you as far as your writing career goes–you just need a little patience. I know, I know–I hate when people tell me that! And don’t ask the Universe for patience, because it will teach you patience by making you wait even more! Having said that, let’s look at your cards. The 7 of Pentacles is a card that represents growing resources. Right now, you may not feel like you’re rich (one of the ways we measure success), but your resources are growing, even if you can’t always see the growth that is happening. It’s OK to rest and not push yourself all the time to produce something. Everything in nature is cyclical, and when we have fallow times, it’s the Universe’s way of saying, “This is a time for thinking, for dreaming, for resting, for inner work. It’s not a time for activity.” This is where you are right now. Enjoy this energy–it won’t last forever! The Ace of Cups echoes this in your challenge card. Aces always represent new beginnings, and Cups are the suit of emotions and creative efforts. Your challenge right now is finding a project that captures your heart and your imagination. If you haven’t found it yet, don’t give up–it will come! The inspiration is right around the corner. You WILL have more ideas. Until something begins to gel, do other creative things to help yourself stay positive and upbeat. The Temperance card further counsels you to remain balanced in your life in order to face your writing career challenges. Trying to force yourself to do something that you’re not feeling strongly about will not help the situation. Allowing time for play, for other work, for family and friends–these things keep us balanced and happy, so allow time for this as well. This is the “right mix” that Temperance counsels you to find. This is the best way to achieve peace, and thus to spur the flow! Finally, 2013 looks very promising for you in your writing career. The 4 of Wands indicates celebrations, a happy family time, and perhaps a move of house or office that will benefit you. Four is a stable and reliable number, so you should see a steady flow of energy around your writing as the New Year starts.

Jennifer, I hope this reading gives you some insight. Thank you so much for submitting your question! Blessings!

Folks, that’s all I have time for this week. Don’t forget–YOU can submit a question for next month’s First Friday Free Readings feature. Just email your question to info@vandeneynden.biz and look for your answer to be posted here on Friday, November 2. Until then, I send you all peace, love, and infinite light! Happy Autumn! xo

 

 

 

 

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